Meditation for Sunday, April 11, 2021
The reading from this week is the post resurrection scene in which Jesus returns to the disciples while they are still hiding out in Jerusalem.
(John 20:19-31)
The disciples have locked themselves into the upstairs room where they held the last supper. They are afraid. And now Jesus appears bringing with him the gift of the Holy Spirit (which is the gift of Peace).
This is a profound passage about the gift of Peace. But it is most widely remembered for the phrase it has engendered: “Don’t be a Doubting Thomas.” Thomas was not with the disciples when Jesus returned the first time. He reacts with disbelief or rather defensively to the story they have recounted.
Thomas invites us into the scene so that we can be there too. Thomas is our way in. Thomas means twin. And in some ways he mirrors us. Scripture refers to him as, “Thomas Didymus, also called the twin.” Both Didymus and Thomas actually mean Twin. He helps us into the story by mirroring us – and the way we may feel.
Why God, did you reveal yourself to everyone but me? Why come when I was not here? Why not me? It seems to be a real plea – a real question we may have.
God, here I am in my suffering and grief – and you have revealed yourself to my siblings… but why not me? Isn’t this our own question? We can feel that pain of rejection at different times in our lives. Each of us may feel it at different times and in different ways. Most everyone is feeling it a bit now during Covid as we have been isolated from one another, grieving, and afraid over this past year:
Why God have you given hope and Peace and faith to some of us? And right now I can’t conjure up any. This is part of our human journey. And Thomas allows us to feel it and say it openly to God.
Jesus says touch my wounds. I know your human suffering. I am with you even in your woundedness. It is so very intimate.
He says, you too – even those who can’t be with us now are blessed. We may lean on the Holy Spirit in the knowledge and understanding that each time we hold onto the gift of Peace through these trials we will come out with more wisdom and with more wholeness for offering that healing intimacy to one another.